Thursday, February 5, 2009

Sad Sad Oatmeal

So some of the meds they put me on to help control the migraines... make me want, no... NEED to eat ALL. THE. TIME. Oh dear. This is not going to be pretty. I'd like to think that I have a little "wiggle" room considering I've had three kids, so what's a couple pounds eh? No no no.

"Gee, Meg... you don't look so good today. You feeling alright?" .....

"Why thanks so much for asking, actually I've been eating like a Tyrannosaurus Rex, and I'm still hungry and my tummy is growling so you'd better quit talking and move quick before I snag your lunch too."

This is where I wipe the drool off my lip and 2nd chin and let out a little belch. Yum.

This morning, I plan ahead. (Novel idea!) I pack a yogurt, oatmeal, and banana for breakfast and head to work. It is a BUSY morning at work. How many things can go wrong? How many ideas can be mis-communicated so readily that everyone in the same room comes out with a different version of the plan? My emails to my boss are blunt and to the point: "This seems like a good idea... (but this is really soooo far out of my league I have no idea what I'm talking about so please make a decision on my behalf...quickly so I don't make you look bad too) Have a great day!"

I have no idea how I managed to keep my head off the desk today. It really just wanted to lie down and raise the flag and signal defeat. At some point I realized I was terribly light headed and should eat. Banana- done. Yogurt- done. I take my little oatmeal pack and venture to the break room where I fill my coffee cup up with the designated amount of water and pour the quick oats in. Simply put into microwave... and...

Push start


Please just cook my oatmeal so it's not cold. It doesn't need to be hot. I'm not picky, just a little warmth is all I'm asking. Microwave is successfully resisting all attempts to start.

Nope. No go. Cold flippin oatmeal. Not even cooked, so the oats are still crunchy actually, unless I want to leave them there for 20 minutes to take on water.

This is my day people. Throw me a bone here already. You ever wonder what God really looks like? Does he get a kick out of this? I really, honestly think he's just up there laughing at me...

1 comment:

Last of the Fauxicans said...

Wow. I mean, wow. Seriously, you had me at Wilford Brimley. Honestly, you had me at commenting on my blog, because I'm secretly narcissistic, but that's neither here not there. Really, though, it's the little things, like oatmeal, that get my attention. Best of luck in all your endeavors. I'll be around.