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Found the Key!!!

Guess what was in my desk!?!?! Lemme tell you. Not a darn stinkin' thing. One down, two to go. Ya know, someone is laughing at me up there. They're getting a real kick outta this. Cute. Real Cute.

Learning is Human

It's fun and exciting at its best, and awkward and embarrassing most of the rest of the time. Ugh. Wish I could just be a little less human. The last couple days has lent itself to teaching me I'm not the only one this happens to. Ha! I feel better already...

Bitty Baby is learning how to walk. She's learning how to fall too, by tripping over the rug and then falling face first into the table leg she was trying to get to. Oh Bitty. She's learned that she likes mommy's lap to snuggle in when she's not feeling well. She feels better when she wipes her sticky snotty runny nose right across my blouse before work. Maybe she's marking her territory?

Middle Bebe has been quite perfect lately. This is excellent, especially considering the chaos that encompasses our world has offered her. Nonetheless, she borrowed a pair of Ugg boots from a friend for her Halloween costume. The mom left a message a few days ago that they need the Ugg boots back before a trip down south. Of course I did not get this message until after they left. That was the first mistake. The second was thinking that a 2nd grader could dutifully take care of a pair of Ugg boots. Not only did she wear them in the rain, and into the puddles, but they were a little snug on her feet, and so apparently her toes are just peeking through the toe of the boot in a nice BIG HOLE! I asked her what she thought we should do. "Give them back," was her answer. Smart but wrong. Here is a prime time to teach this dear little one about borrowing. If you borrow something, you'd better return in the same shape IF NOT IN BETTER shape than how it was first received. It's just what you do. She wrote the friend a note saying thank you for loaning them, sorry I ruined them. She will return the damaged boots in a bag to the friend with this note. And at the bottom of the bag will be a new pair that she has put allowance towards and will work off the rest. She said on the way home tonight that she was sad about the whole thing. I said yes, that is okay to feel sad. But it's also okay to feel good about doing the right thing now. That's how we learn to make and keep good friends.

Big bebe said today in the store that she'd like some body wash for the shower. Ok. She is getting into a more girlie stage, so what the hey, she wants body wash and not black eyeliner and a tattoo? We've got a deal. So we are looking through the shelves and she says she really needs body wash...she's already got something for her head and shoulders and now she needs body wash. (apparently good ol bar soap is not in the equation.) Hahahaha I'm laughing because I know I just stocked the little girls' shower with "Head and Shoulders" shampoo. Oh to live and learn. I explained to her that the NAME of the shampoo was head and shoulders....hahahaha

Hubby learned that if you get mad at a raccoon who keeps getting into the trash NO MATTER WHAT, that if you shoot at the raccoon to scare him away, and that if you accidentally actually hit him and kill him on the front lawn, you'd better have a plan what to do with it. Don't tell me you're a marine who is trained for war, but now you're squeemish at a dead raccoon. Sorry buddy, you're on your own.

I've learned this week that when I wear high heels and then my back hurts, I feel oddly guilty when I go to the chiropractor. Hmph. I've learned that in the move I've misplaced:
1/my camera
2/my new checks (great way to save money!)
3/the key to my home desk.
**note here that items 1+2 could very well be IN the desk that I cannot open. **

I just can't win. But I can laugh!

Sounds of Mama

Don't know if you know this or not. But you remind me so much of my mama. I try not to stare. I try not to gaze; it's just you're so much like her. The way you speak, the way you laugh, the way your lips form words and sentences. Sometimes when you talk there seems to be a hint of hidden southern drawl. It's soothing to my ears...just like mama. I'd give anything to be right next to you all day long, silently relishing the sounds so familiar to me. Such a beautiful sound. I just want to sit and listen for a while...

Don't Know Much About Nuttin'...

But these little ones keep me right where I need to be:

Love Love Love these sweet girls of mine. I am blessed. And thankful. And humbled.

A Little Vent

What a wonderful, glorious, beautiful day. Go to church. Take a nap. Get up and visit with a friend. Take a longer nap. Go to a RAW (church-ish thingie.) Stop to get groceries on the way home. This is where it takes an ugly turn. =(

I have a medium filled shopping cart of groceries. (Very healthy-- I might add. Tons of veggies, milk, rice milk, bananas, long grain brown rice, whole wheat bread...) There are only two check out lines open, both of which are 15 items or less. I actually walk the ENTIRE length of ALL the stands to make sure there isn't a regular one open. Nope. I then let the little lady behind me go in front as she has so few items.

I'm making a conscious effort here. Then out of NO WHERE, maybe 15 (FIFTEEN!!!!) people are now over flowing into the aisles WAITING for ME and my MORE than 15 stupid grocery items. They are glaring at me. Then the checker has the nerve to GLARE at me. Maybe I'm too sensitive. They call 2 extra checkers who have just left for the day, or are outside getting carts. The glares continue.

I open my purse. No checks. Oh hell. No credit card. Oh you have got to be kidding me. But never fear: I am a super-multi-planner-ahead-er, so I pull out the "back -up" check book. (This would be the savings account and not the regular checking account.) Write the check. Hand it over. It's over $100 so they need the manager's approval. More glares. Wait for the manager. Then process the check. "Is this a new account Ma'am. Cause now I'm gonna need to call the manager back down here to approve this too." Glares continue.

No it's not a new flipping account. It's old as all hell cause I try and do the right thing and actually save a little cash when I get a chance. I just choose NOT to always write checks to the grocery store with it. DUH! Please make me feel MORE insecure here standing in YOUR stupid line when YOU didn't provide ANY OTHER check out stands. Is there a law I missed that said no one can purchase more than 15 items after 8pm? I am paying for GROCERIES. I don't expect my money to pay for your fabulous attitude, but it sure as hell better not buy my your mean, glaring eye balls while I'm buying veggies, rice milk and long grain brown rice.

But you know what. Even though I know your job description says you should ask me if I need help out to my car, and you didn't ask, I won't hold it against you. I said thank you when you handed me my receipt. If our paths ever cross again I hope you recognize me. Maybe your family member will be sick and need help with their bill, And I'll be the one to help. Maybe you'll come to my church and I can pray with you there. Maybe your child will ride in my car on the next 2nd grade field trip. I'll make sure to give your kid an extra hug and smile. Cause the good Lord knows it sure as hell isn't coming from you.

Nesting

Finished my book last night: Secret Life of Bees. I am in love with that book. I am in love with reading and being transported to a world that transcends my common every day life. Anything to take me away.

And so I am nesting in my new house. My new-to-me house that I'm trying to "nest" into my home. Now that most things are unpacked, though not neat by any means, I can get to the stuff that really matters. When the baby is asleep, and the big girls tucked in, Hubby watching TV or already nodding off, I can start to unpack my favorites...safely, methodically, thoughtfully in the peace of the night.

I have a small little nightstand next to my side of the bed. It is my shrine of sorts. A couple pictures, a handful of delicate cards from precious friends, an angel of peace, a bouquet of dried flowers from mama, three candles, a bible...

Somehow my book collection has multiplied. The books I HAVE TO HAVE close by and now I have too many. So I couldn't just shove them in there. These are the books that speak to me. So I stayed up late sorting through them, feeling guilty about which ones I could keep there and which ones would have to be put on the bookshelf. Like they had feelings or something. And why do I think I'm going crazy? Maybe cause I think my books have feelings. But these are the ones whose feelings I ended up caring most about:

White Oleander - Janet Fitch

Taking Care of Your Child

Intercessory Prayer - Dutch Sheets

My mom's 2006 appointment book

The Purpose Driven Life - Rick Warren
Jarhead - Anthony Swafford

Peace Life a River - Leif Engler

A Book of Love Poetry - edited by Jon Stallworthy

Sunrise - Karen Kingsbury

Mind as Healer Mind as Slayer - Kenneth R. Polletier

Mystic River - Dennis Lehane

When I Was a Girl - edited by Allison Pollet

Remembering Blue - Connie May Fowler

Becoming a Woman of Excellence - Cynthia Heald

Chesty - Colonel Jon T Hoffman USMC

Small Miracles for Women - Yitta Halberstam abd Judith Loventhal

Tara Road - Maeve Binchy

Strength For Service to God and Country

The Horse Whisperer - Nicholas Evans

I am Not but I know I AM - Louie Giglio

If You Want to Walk on Water You Have to Get Out of The Boat - John Ortberg

Christian Truth and His Defense - For US Marines

and 3 Bibles

Books are a safe place for me and always have been. I've always loved to be lost in writing and reading, scripture and poetry, music and lyrics. Can't wait to have the piano in the house soon too. It will add another much needed dimension to help transform my heart and house into a home. And so I nest.

My Voting Day

I've been really watching and listening and taking in all this information leading up to election day. I'm not particularly politically outspoken. I've got plenty of stances and opinions, but choose to keep these mostly to myself. Except for Dad. Because he and I can disagree and still have the most respectfully intelligent conversations. I get more out of those talks than I do with anything else. I actually THRIVE on hearing a view different from mine. I am appreciative of all of it and think that God made us all different and special for a reason. The least I can do is try to see the beauty in the variances.

What I don't understand is why some people think that taking down someone else's signs or defacing them is a way of getting a leg up at the polls. Is their self worth and ethical beliefs so poor that they would actually PREFER winning this way? What is heroic about win this way? Wouldn't it feel better to them to know that they won the people's vote because they BELIEVED in their cause, and NOT because they had to prove the other party wrong?

I've been trying to explain to my kids the differences in McCain and Obama and this and that and on and on, and what each brings to the table. Just because we choose to vote for one, does NOT mean it makes all other opponents wrong. All can be an okay choice, and we get to vote for our preference. It doesn't need to be a taking sides thing. In a time in this world when we're trying to desperately teach our children acceptance and caring and community, there is this election that pits us against each other. It doesn't have to be that way. We are all "fighting" for the same team. Remember?

Just because my husband is a Marine does not mean I support the war. It doesn't mean I DON'T support the war either. He didn't join because he wanted to kill or be killed. He joined to make a difference.

This is how I define it:
A veteran is someone who at one point in his life wrote a blank check made payable to the United States of America for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is honor and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.

So many people are talking. I think we've got to shut up and listen in order to get anything accomplished and moving in the right direction. You have to know when to prod and when to be quiet and when to let things take their course.

Fall Back

Loving the whole IDEA of an extra hour's sleep, not particularly diggin' the second guessing of time that I'm doing now. Paranoia for sure. I'm a geek anyhow who checks and double checks the time on my phone, the alarm clock, triple check the oven clock and then the car clock. This is already a normal daily routine. Ugh. Toss in there to the mix a time change, even if it means extra sleep, and I'm SUPER paranoid. I'm just short of leaving sticky notes on every clock I see to remind myself if I've already re-set it. OCD much? Gotta be good at something I suppose. This week I'm a really special over-zealous clock setter-checker.
Check. Check.

And I'm Back

This blog isn't nearly long enough to sum up the last several days. There are many places I can't go mentally right now. What I've decided in the meantime is this: I need something mid-week to re-center, to spiritually ground me. So I'm on the look out.

Here are my favorite things about being in the new house:

* The sound of the cleansing rain lulling me to sleep

* The way the dish washer WASHES dishes...meaning NOT ME washing the dishes (1st dish washer EVER!!)

* The dining room that has gigantic windows on 3 walls

* The garage to temporarily house my junk until I find another clever place to stash it in the house

* The sound of neighborhood kids running up the back steps

* Passing out Halloween candy for the first time ever as a family in a neighborhood

* The wood burning stove that makes the house feel and smell SO COZY

* Loving that Bitty is sleeping in another bedroom

Also in the week we've been here without telephone or computer access, I've fully thrown myself into this book:

I know the movie is about to come out (has already come out?) and I am determined to finish the book first before seeing the movie myself. Anybody care to join me? I forgot how much I like reading. And this book is beautiful beautiful BEAUTIFUL. Loving it and the places it takes my scattered brain.

On The Move, Part Deux

We've had 3 nights in the new place, and I've slept like a log each night, I think due to exhaustion. Each day we make trips from the old house to the new house. Work and pack. Eat and move. Sleep and dream about packing and moving.

Hubby and his buddys moved all the big stuff; God bless 'em. I'm in charge of the rest of the stuff. So today mid afternoon I leave Hubby and the bebes at the new house and venture to the old house to continue packing and cleaning, sorting and trashing. I'm driving Hubby's truck and need to back it up the gravel driveway, which means switching from 2wheel drive to 4wheel drive. No biggie, and I back up as close as I can to the steps and trees, without running into them. Well, you see, I might have just over-accelerated a tad bit, it was a love tap really.

I then spend 4+ hours cleaning out 2 bedrooms, a laundry room, living room and half the kitchen. I am so proud of myself. I have a pile to throw away, a pile for Good Will, and I fit a lot of stuff in the truck. Yay me! I go to close the tail gate of the truck. No go. I try again, harder, CLANG! This is its way of telling me, "DENIED!" Awww shoot. The tail gate clearly isn't about to close because it's off about a 1/2 inch and won't latch. I can't drive to the new house with the bed of the truck full and the tail gate not closed.

So I call Hubby and I say, "Hey, want to call Justin for me" (he lives right around the corner) "and see if he can come up and help me close the tailgate?" I would have done this myself but I don't have his number because I lost my cell phone, and it's a little ways down the road. I tell Hubby (while crossing my fingers) that maybe there's too much stuff so it won't close, but I don't want to undo the packing if it just needs a little muscle. I'm thinking here I can tell Justin what really happened and he can help me. Again, no go. Hubby says, "I'll be right down."

Hubby tells me I must have hit something. Hmmm, interesting. I nod, and try to look a little shocked. Then he turns around and points to the tree and the very large dent in the tree at EXACTLY the same height and width of the tail gate. Crap. I'm caught.

"See. You hit the tree, did you even feel that?"

And I say, "Is that what that was?"

Oh he loves me. I know he loves me because he just shook his head and rolled his eyes and walked into the house to get his tools. Nothing more. Nothing less. Can't wait to have all this moving stuff be over with though.