Who Am I Joking?

What indication did I need that this was a bad day, right in the middle of a bad week, and a wretched month? I really already knew that this time has been doomed, but then like I needed a flashing neon light attached to my head with an arrow that pointed to me and says SHE IS HAVING A SHITTY DAY! Is that necessary? Does everyone around me need to know the extent of the aforementioned shittiness? <-- Here the blog would like to edit my 'shittiness' for non-grammatical compliance and replace it with shiftiness or chattiness. I am shifty yes. Chatty no.

Talked myself into a virtual circle trying to explain to the IT folks some techie problems I've been having. Heh. Winner. Then advanced to driving in a literal circle trying to leave work, but exiting the parking lot the wrong way, thus needing to go completely around the block, turn back into work, and then re-exit the correct direction. Now I am late. For an uber important meeting. And NO frickin way I'm going to tell them WHY I'm late now. And now there are witnesses... who watched me drive out the first time, then re-emerge and drive out a second time.

Can I just ask here, and I say this with ALL RESPECT to God who knit me together in my mother's womb... what purpose does it serve to have a female ovulate twice a month? You get where I'm going with this. So I'm stressed. It's not like I need PROOF like an X marks the spot. HEY YOU!!! YOU STRESSED? LET ME MARK YOUR TERRITORY SO YOU REMEMBER YOU'RE STRESSED.... days later.... STILL STRESSED? LET ME MARK I AGAIN SEE IF WE CAN'T GET IT RIGHT THIS TIME.

Jokingly told a coworker TODAY that the only way this day was going to end well was with a bullet and could he provide it? Good naturedly he said no, and that if he did, it would need to be two 'cause he isn't sticking this out without me. Ha. We laughed. I tried to keep the funnies going and told him he'll know when it's time when he comes to my desk and I lay a bullet down, and then he'll pull out one to match. (I realize this is NOT terribly funny to most folks- and for that I am sorry. But I am officially crazy and you should get a sense of humor.) THEN coworker #2 walks in to talk about something work related, which we all discussed, and then as if in slow motion she pulls out a bee bee from her pocket and sets it down on my desk RIGHT WHERE I'd pretended to put the bullet. Coworker #1 says: OH MY GOD. And I say: IT'S TOTALLY A SIGN! and coworker #1 again: YOU'RE TOTALLY SCREWED!!!