Special

Fyi... this is my 2nd attempt at writing this. I'm losing it, I tell ya. Here goes. If it deletes again, then it means it's just not stories that are meant to be told I guess. =(
In no particular order, this is my life:

I (unintentionally- obviously!)washed and dried brownies. Now my pillow cases and blankets smell like brownies. Kind off. Not nearly as cool as it sounds. Maybe more like baker's chocolate? Apples too made it into that particular load. They held their form well, considering.

Lu had 3 armpit hairs that we named and she tried to cut w/scissors…not safe. So in the process of her first shaving event (after I bought her a shaver), she also shaved off her eyebrow.

Oh also…. I had Lu pack her bags for camp into the car before church in case we didn’t have time to go back home after church on Sunday. Somehow, someway I ended up with the biggest smear of ink (sparkly purple….maybe puff pen paint?) on the arse of my pants. Maybe there was a reason that I sat in the back of church and pushed the buttons for the computer (more than just the regular gal was gone….) but this wasn’t revealed to me til after church. Now I HAD to jet home to change my clothes before the funeral. Ugh!!!!!!!!!

So church, then funeral, then during the funeral scoot away long enough to stand in 100- weather to check in Lu to summer camp

Again back to the funeral…. At a very large local county park… again still 100- weather. My dad is not there, but should be, where is he? I joke with a friend that my dad in a very Walter Matthau kind of way will show up late and wander directly into the very middle of the funeral and then loudly say my name to see if I respond to see if he’s in the right place. NOT JOKING…10 minutes later I see my dad’s car pull into the parking lot a little ways away. I send Nat back behind the funeral and around the side to go get him and show him where we are. Didn’t go as planned. I then see Dad wandering aimlessly around the edge of the lawn (kind of trying to be stealth, but he’s kind of a larger man, and wearing a very large sombrero type hat) trying to look for where he should be. All eyes are on him now. Swell. THEN… there is Nat galloping in her hot pink shirt running after him, but ducking behind bushes as she goes (so not to attract attention… but inevitably attracts MUCH MORE attention) trying to catch him. This is my family. =) Yay me.

Bad communication on so many levels really all by myself just not communicating events in a timely manner to the part of my brain that needed to know... last minute this morning figured out that I had to bring Nat with me to work. Needed to get through time cards so staff can be paid on time and then a teleconference. That's all. Then of course a few minutes after the call should have come thru for the meeting… got an email from my boss that he was running late and would just meet me at my office. Did he tell me that he was already in the parking lot? NO. Did he tell me the other big-wigs were here on site and not up at corporate? NO. OMG I almost choked….as I had Natalie literally hiding in the corner of my office doing projects. Special. If I was to go back and count those moments, perhaps there was one minute from the time I desperately called for a friend, shooed Nat out the door and cleaned up her clown/post-it/cardboard/glue/highlighter project that was in the corner of my office. And then there he was. Have I mentioned that although I have staff who report to me, I'm really just a peon? Have I made it clear that he is very important and the CFO and VP of Finance? Why do I put myself in these situations? Oh well. I made it out alive.... and no one was the wiser.

Lastly, hubby said he was going to get a car cover for this old wreck of a classic car that is sitting in my driveway rotting. I was fully supportive of the purchase of the car cover. He comes home with this extra -large tent looking thing.... are we hosting a circus?It is hideous. It's really only going to draw more attention to the old car because it's bright white and all. He asks for help putting it up. I tell him no. It's ugly and downright shameful and I'm not touching it. He's hurt, says he'd help me if I asked. I said do you really need my help? Yes. I say: Do you realize that you are a Marine and are trained in killing people in hand to hand combat with no other help... and yet you cannot put up this thing that you super sized from a car cover to a circus tent all by yourself?

I have a headache. Gee I wonder why?

June Pictures From the House of Meg

Situational Meg

Situation#1: Someone looks at me funny because I’m getting 2 coffees.
What I say: It's a two-fer day
What I really want to say: Listen here sucker. Yup I'm getting two LARGE coffees and I plan on drinking them both all by myself. Why bother driving here twice when I can already tell I need TWO. I'm saving gas, helping global warming and all that other crap you're going to blame me for. And actually truth be known, if I had more arms and more hands to carry them there coffees, I'd be getting one for each hand. No joke.

Situation#2: Someone I've known in passing at least twice a week for a couple years kind of as an acquaintance says "You work, Meg? Where do you work? I didn't know you worked. Didn't know you had a job... is it a real job a full time job?"
What I say: For a hospital, actually two...
What I really want to say: Really? Are you asking me this? I don't know if I should be flattered that I appear so light spirited that I'm not being dragged down by work every waking minute, or should I be offended because you and I have talked about my job before, but clearly you weren't listening ANY of those times. I think I'm done listening to you complain ALL.THE.TIME.

Situation#3: Hubby walks right into the bathroom while I'm sitting on the potty and asks "What are you doing?"
What I say: Nothing. Just glare.
What I really want to say: Hiding from my family

Situation#4:Unidentified person on Sunday nite proposes that our small group take the month of July off, and then reevaluate.
What I say: Sure
What I really want to say: Sure...fine. But are you sure you really want to do that? Because in my perfect world I would get to sit back and listen to the music every single day. But hey if you're game, I'll trade Sunday nites for every single day. Really your choice... let me know what works better for you. See how you totally don't have an option? =)

My Many Titles

Mama Mo and I took Kel to get a new outfit for a fancy night out. Oh it was so fun. Dashed out of work for lunch break and seriously raided the department store. The little lovely helpful ladies were not really helpful, but helpful enough to realize we were on a mission and they could just stay out of the way. Kel's in the dressing room and Mama Mo and I are weaving up and down the aisles making outfits, checking sizes, running back, flinging it over the dressing room door while at the same time Kel steps out wearing the last outfit and we critique and then do game plan. She's so cute...does a couple squats to see if the pants really fit, etc...and then we're off again to the next outfit. This was the highlight of my week. It was actually last week, and I'm still riding it out thank you very much.

Went to a graduation party for a friend on Saturday evening. Have I mentioned that I LOVE margaritas? I only had one and it was plenty. Bitty wore her new(to her) sparkly pink party shoes. I will get a pic up of those at some point. Almost like on queue Bitty would grab a little carrot and stick it in her mouth, chew it around for a while, then wander over to me and look at the ladies around me and then spit the half chewed carrot into my hand (which I would then chuck over my shoulder over the deck...) except it kept happening again.... and again... and again....What fine parents this little person must have to teach her such manners!! Also confessed that this party (that was only attended by 4 or 5 people that I actually knew out of maybe 45) was one of the best parties I'd been to in a looooonng time... go ahead... I dare you.... guess why!

Got a message from Dear Ol' Dad. (Realize here that he is sooo cute and only usually leaves me messages around midnight on my work phone so he doesn't bother me...) The message goes something like this... "So Meg, Father's day is coming up and I'd like you to know that I think we should go to breakfast on Saturday this year. Also I have something already that I would really like you to give me for father's day." Go ahead. Re-read that last sentence a few times. It's real. This is my father. Already done and gone and picked out and paid for his own father's day gift, and I'll be damned if he isn't just going to be pleased as punch when he opens it up-- assuming he's gone ahead and wrapped it too.

Have I mentioned that the big girls have been with Grandma and Grampy for the last couple days camping? They came back happy, grimy little things. While they were gone I spent most of the evenings with Bitty working on the yard and planting a garden, weeding, arranging, potting, watering. She's quite helpful and so dang cute the way she squats down to look at the bugs go by. Let me tell you something. Even if you can't see ALL the bugs, that doesn't mean they aren't there. Even if the sun isn't going down quite yet, make a run for your house and hide your children. Bitty likes mosquitoes. Nope.... wait....what was that? Oh yes.... right.

Correction: The mosquitoes like Bitty especially the little spots around her eye balls. =(

I did not beat my child. I promise.

I found Bitty and Hubby asleep on the front lawn in a camping chair this afternoon. Very sweet. Precious actually. I should have taken a picture. But that didn't cross my mind til right about now. I scooped up Bitty and brought her inside with me to snuggle on the couch. Then she peed on me.

Hi. I'm Meg. I'm a mom, hunter and gatherer of clothes, receptacle for partially chewed vegetables, an only daughter not apparently capable of picking out a worthy father's day gift, child endanger-er, and the wear-er of pee... both the actual pee itself leaving the territory visibly marked but also the invisible yet pungent smell of urine for hours to come. I'm Meg. And I'm a winner.

For the Love of God...

...and the sanity of my friends who have been sooooo loyal and loving while listening to me gripe and whine... This blog is dedicated to the things that I love and appreciate and the things that make me happy today at this particular moment:

1. My friends who can and will listen, will hug and will love, and will tell me when enough is enough


2. Live music in small venues


3. Anything mosaic


4. Candle lit dinner with the family


5. Pesto


6. Little white lights


7. Old photographs


8. Thunder and Lightning


9. Wake boarding


10. Love notes, cards, emails, texts, post-its, you get the idea... words are powerful


11. Mulberry candles


12. Flip flops


13. James' sweatshirts


14. My thesaurus


15. Mascara


16. Men in uniform


17. The Rodeo


18. Those trinagle thingies they use to call the family in to dinner on a farm


19. Long drives with no destination and really good music, bring on the tears!


20. Apple-mango laundry detergent


21. My Xanax


22. My mickey mouse jammies, lovingly referred to as 'my mickies'


23. Chocolate milk


24. Riding horses


25. True love stories


26. Lame jokes that make me laugh but not necessarily anyone else


27. Oregon chai tea latte with whipped cream


28. Homemade banana bread


29. Late night talks with really good friends


30. And this little gem that I came across today:

"Peace. It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or pain. It means to be in the midst of these things and still be calm in your heart."

Things I Don't Understand

I can't even blog today...nothing constructive, no format, no common theme. I'm just sad and mad and I'm just going to let it flow. I'm angry and I want to complain about it and I want people to leave me alone, except for B cause she always has the BEST hugs.

So this is a story about my BFF. And if you know her, you know her and you know this story. And if you don't, then you don't and she gets to keep her anonymity. Really I want to post a picture of her so you all can see her radiant beauty, and the amazing soul that shines through her eyes. But I won't. I'll just tell you about her.

We've been BFFs since 7th grade. We'd go to the Strawberry Festival and also to Donner with her parents. We'd go to summer camp together at Pondy. We played soccer together: varsity, comp, and indoor. Um we dressed up for Halloween together, memorable years were the Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum, and then another when we climbed into boxes and wrapped them with Christmas paper and our little legs sticking out. We were special. SPECIAL.

You know there are some (a few)people you can trust no matter what. No matter how awkward, how hard, how hurtful, how sad. Sometimes you don't even need to speak, you just trust them to be right there with you for that moment so you're not in alone.

She came to see mama when mama was ICU and completely psychotic and mama was ramblings words with no meaning, and screaming at bugs that weren't there. She came to me there and just was. Present. She came to the house when mama was dying. It didn't faze her that Mama was dying from the outside in and her skin was falling off. She held her hand and spoke sweetly to her. No words for me, which is just was I needed. No words, just this friend to be present with me, in that place. She came and rescued me, came right along side me after the birth of Bitty and hubby being sick and back in the hospital. She came to be with me and has the most beautifully calming way of being attentive, loving, and encouraging. I am blessed to have a friend like this, who can step in without skipping a beat and be an extra set of hands and feet.

Her dad got sick with cancer soon after high school. Oh and what a warrior he was. For years and years and years. So tell me... why does life play out this way? For 16 years she has been the best friend ever. For 10 years her dad fought cancer fiercely. Why WHY WHY would it happen that her daddy would start to slip markedly, and the same day she thinks she's going into labor (in another city), then her Dad is in ICU, and she's on the verge of giving birth hours away. She did get to say goodbye to her daddy in person, but he passed and lost his battle with cancer 48 hours before the baby was born. Her first child missed the chance of meeting his grandpa by 48 hours. 48 HOURS!!!

Her dad died this past Saturday the 6th. Sweet baby Biggio was born this morning the 8th.

A friend told me once that sometimes it isn't the lesson that you need to learn (through hard times), but it's the lesson that needs to be taught through you. On some level this seems that this SHOULD make sense, but when I'm hurting and those around me are hurting, I have a really hard time believing this with my heart and not just my lips.

I love you my BFF, more than you'll ever know and more that I'll ever be able to express.

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up - Galatians 6:9 (NIV)

Things I know FOR SURE

In order of occurrence today:

• I am ready at a moment's notice for Mrs. Biggio today for many reasons
• Completely randomly have curly-ish hair today
• I made the most super fancy chai with a cinnamon stick and whipped cream and .... left it behind on the kitchen counter as I ran out the door to work today =(
• While driving the kids to school, Nat pulled a bag out of her backpack that smelled RANK and looked like cheeze-whiz had exploded in it... be she SWEARS it was just a peach yogurt from a couple weeks ago. OMG. Where do these kids come from?
• Watched Lu look frantically around the car for her I LOVE MATT picture. I feigned equal interest in the frantic look and said "Oh what ever shall we do if we cannot find this one I LOVE MATT picture though there are HUNDREDS more at home in Lu's room!?" HA. One point mom.
• My lunch never made it to the work fridge because (1) I was afraid it may disappear again and (2) after having it sitting right there staring at me I could not resist and ate it at about 930
• Know way too many people who are pregnant or who have just had babies... then my ovaries start talking to my uterus like I'm not even there like my opinion just doesn't matter
• Worked on a monthly 3 part spreadsheet, 24 months worth, for 2 hospitals= 144 excel spreadsheets that played tricks on my brain
• My staff can gauge how my day is going/if this is a good time to ask a question based on how soon in the day I put my hair up
• Am not above telling someone, "I don't understand. I won't understand. Tell me what you want my answer to be.... Ok. Sure. Done."
• Explained in detail to Miss K why I do not own silly little half sweater thingies for the very important reason that they hit me just above the roll of back fat
• I have an incredibly keen nose for chocolate (I should have put this later in this list and not so close to the back fat item)
• Bitty grabs my cell phone, hands it to me and says: WANNA HELLO?
• Appreciates that hubby dressed Bitty this morning, and her clothes have been on backwards all day long
• Really REALLY thought that Bitty was saying something not good and I ran from the kitchen to the living room, but found her instead trying to say to her little stuffed dog: OH SIT! as she placed him on her little chair
• Also appreciates that Bitty thinks I need the Elmo step stool UNDER my feet while I'm sitting on the toilet
• I do not so much appreciate the force with which she INSISTS that I put it under my feet. Geometry, mathematics and physics makes this particularly difficult
• Am admitting to the world tonight that I actually cannot figure out how to turn the dang TV on or off without the assistance of my children

Multiple Choice II

Back by popular demand!
(and the fact that since the last posting, I've honestly only been thinking in multiple choice format...)

Q1: Now that Bitty has mastered sitting on the potty, her next favorite potty-themed thing to do is:

1. read a book while sitting on the pot
2. plunge the toilet
3. restock the toilet paper
4. nothing, just does her business and gets back to playing

Q2: While rearranging and cleaning the pantry this evening (more evidence that I have no life) I stumbled upon a staggering find:

1. 50 cans of tuna
2. 47 cans of string beans
3. 16 split pea soup mixes
4. all of the above

Q3: This weekend a neighbor knocked on our door and said:

1. Thank you for keeping your yard so tidy! What a beautiful sight.
2. We're having a BBQ in honor of you and your high quality of parenting standards
3. Is that blood on your front stoop?
4. We have an apology... and we need to get a scooter out of your tree

Q4: I have a recent strange obsession with:

1. laundry
2. the Wendy's 'Get frosty with me' commercial :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jfhpYrUk3dE
3. feeding the fishies
4. packing lunches

Q5: Speaking of lunches... today for lunch I had:

1. my favorite sandwich from the local deli
2. an entire cheese pizza
3. an organic mixture of parsley, turnips and red onions
4. um... nothin because someone at work decided they needed to eat my lunch and not me... I'm not bitter--REALLY!

Q6: At the end of an awful work day, you'll die laughing from Mama Mo talking about:

1. anything...everything
2. Ellie who yelled NOOOOO in the teacher's face on the meet and greet day for pre-school
3. A cat ornament and a rubber band
4. Mr fancy doctor with the fancy accent

Q7: The Director of Information Services at corporate said to me yesterday:

1. Please don't say that ever again
2. I am officially giving you an honorary enrollment and inducting you into the club of 'Last to Know'
3. Hahahahahahaaaa <-- Just laughed at me
4. huh?

Q8: I know that God exists for many reasons, but today was re-reminded by

1. the chocolate-caramel covered pretzels I found when cleaning out the pantry
2. the loving way that someone weaseled my lunch out of the fridge today
3. how pleasant my kids were with each other this evening
4. the abundant energy I have at the end of the day

Q9: The bathrooms at work...

1. are incredibly clean and non smelly
2. delightfully relaxing
3. straight up gross
4. cleaned with the same cleaner they used at my high school and instantly make me feel really insecure all over again

Q10: When I was little I was convinced that I would grow up to be:

1. a famous figure skater
2. a history teacher
3. a bank teller
4. a police officer

Q11: In my genealogy lineage I am a product of someone of what profession:

1. Newspaper reporter who worked unknowingly for the mafia running 'errands' for them
2. a tight rope walker who ran away to be with the circus
3. A professional fencer who brought the Cornell fencing team just short of the Olympics
4. Was the general manager for the United States Atomic Energy Commission